Not Knowing Where To Go….


Behind the FallsI think there is a difference between not knowing exactly where you are going, and actually being lost.

Lost is a feeling.  A negative state of being.  There is a certain fear attached.  Whether you are actually physically lost, or just feeling that way… it can be an unpleasant experience and one that you are trying to escape from.

Not knowing where you are going on the other hand, can be a surprisingly freeing experience.  It’s not one that I am used to being comfortable with.  Being the total control freak that I am… I usually want to know all the variables ahead of time.  I do have the odd occasion, especially when I have the camera with me… of just getting in the car and heading out in no particular direction and just letting inspiration and intuition guide me.  And usually on those occasion, I end up having the most fun and getting some great shots.

But when it comes to life in general… I like to know where I am going.  Even though life keeps letting me know, over and over again… that it doesn’t quite work that way.  It seems that every time I think I have my destination in mind, life throws yet another curve ball my way.

And for now at least… I am doing my absolute best to be totally OK with the uncertainty.  Learning to just trust the process and enjoy the journey, without too much thought to the eventual destination.  It’s a fairly new concept for me.  As someone who is studying with the view to achieving a qualification, it would be nice to know that at the end of all the hard work, there was something waiting for me.  Some kind of reward, career, opportunities… something.  But life doesn’t come with a guarantee and as I have already observed in my own life, unexpected plot twists are par for the course.

So just like those impromptu scenic drives I sometimes take… or like a hike through the rainforest to some undisclosed destination… for now at least, I am just going to enjoy the ride, and who knows where I may eventually end up.  But wherever that happens to be… I trust that it will be EXACTLY where I need to be.