Most of us would describe ourselves a good and loving people. When it comes to how we treat others, we are generally kind and caring… and would never think of speaking badly to another, or acting with malicious intent.
So why is it that so often, we fail to show ourselves that same basic common decency?
Often times, it is in the way that we speak to ourselves… belittling our achieves, or failing to recognise them at all. Putting ourselves down and criticising ourselves for things that we would never even consider criticising in another. And sometimes it is even in a more tangible way. Pushing ourselves too hard. Working long hours. Putting the needs of others before that of our own.
Of course there are times when we need to care for family or friends. My poor hubby right now, needs to do almost everything for me. And I feel terrible for it, but I also know that I must learn to graciously accept his loving gift of kindness, because I really have no choice. And beating myself up for requiring this time of recuperation… is not at all helpful to anyone.
The art of saying “no” has long been a tough one for many people. We are raised in a way that makes us feel selfish if we put our own needs first. But this is such a counterproductive way of going about things. For when we drain ourselves of all our energy, how much help are we to those we love… and what kind of example are we setting for others. Selflessness at all costs, is far too high a price to pay.
Taking some much needed time to nurture oneself is not selfish.
After all… it is probably the exact advice you would give to another. “Take care of yourself”… is something you probably have no problem saying to another… but how often do you take that advice onboard for yourself.